Never Gonna Leave You
by Smile-I'mTheEndOfAllThatYouSee
Summary: "I'm never going to leave you again," Miko swears to a stasis induced Bulkhead. Her words remain true even when Bulkhead thinks otherwise. Takes place at the end of "New Recruit".


**After seeing the end of "New Recruit", I had to write this, but I never got around to doing it until now. THis is my first time writing them as main characters so pardon any OOC-ness and if there is, give me constructive critique.**

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Bulkhead limped quietly as best he could to the main room. The others along with the newbie returned from their mission, and he wanted to see how it went. He hoped that the newbie failed. If he did, perhaps Bulkhead wouldn't be replaced. _No point in letting them know I'm right here. I'll be kicked out anyway. _And besides, Bulkhead's right leg was killing him. He didn't want to go any farther than he had to.

He saw the kids on the catwalk and the others gathered around Smokescreen. He listened on as Optimus scolded Smokescreen for not following standard procedure. _Ha! That kid's got nothing on me! His processor's so programmed on glory that he'll never be able to think straight in battle._ A small piece of hope fluttered in his spark. Maybe Optimus is his position here is safe, and he was just being stupid. He continued to watch on.

"However," Optimus said, and Bulkhead perked up.

_There's always a fraggin' "however" or "but," _he thought, annoyed.

Optimus continued on, "I believe we must also commend Smokescreen. You have proven to be a quick study by choosing to place strategy above bravado." Optimus placed a servo on Smokescreen's shoulder, and Bulkhead was reminded of a time when Optimus did that when Bulkhead chose to place care above random destruction in his battles on Earth. _I guess care doesn't matter when you can barely walk and the newbie can think in battle._

"There's going to be no living with him now," Arcee commented.

_Tell me about it, _Bulkhead thought bitterly, bracing his spark for impact.

Optimus wasn't finished. "While this may lack the pageantry of a proper Elite Guard ceremony, I wish to welcome you to Team Prime."

Bulkhead watched with crushed optics as the others looked in acceptance, and Smokescreen looked on with pride. He really was being replaced. He nearly gave his spark for them only to have Smokescreen to waltz right in from a Decepticon escape pod and act like he's the top soldier when he's really nothing but a glory craving newbie. "Huh," Bulkhead grunted in defeat. "The newbie did alright." He looked on the acquired Apex Armor thanks to Smokescreen. _Optimus couldn't retrieve it, but Smokescreen could, and he did. _Smokescreen really is more capable than Bulkhead thought. Capable enough to replace him. He turned around and limped down the long hallway, to his berth where he could curl up and maybe let his whole slaggin' body atrophy and terminate. A fitting end for a battle hardened ex-Wrecker. He should have stayed with the Wreckers.

He heard Miko run down from catwalk. "Don't worry, Bulk. He's got nothing on you," she said enthusiastically, trying to cheer him up.

Bulkhead continued to limp away, ignoring Miko for the first time ever. She didn't need him anymore. Smokescreen was here to take his place. As a guardian. As a friend. "Seriously, once we get that leg of yours back into shape, old Smoke is gonna learn real quick with the top wrecking ball is around here," Miko tried desperately to reassure Bulkhead. He ignored her. On the first day she met him, Miko excitedly asked him questions about himself. At first, Bulkhead was a bit put off, but when he became her guardian, they became the best of friends. When Smokescreen arrives, Miko reacts the same way, and Smokescreen, like Bulkhead at first, was a bit put off. It's only a matter of time before Optimus makes Smokescreen her new guardian, and they go off riding into the sunset together. Miko will drop the love of strength for the love of speed real soon. He really wasn't worth much to her in the end. He never was. Which is worse – being replaced by the team after you've just nearly gave their spark for or being replaced by the girl whom you held in your spark? "Bulkhead?" Miko asks worriedly.

This would be the cue for Bulkhead to stop, kneel down, and offer his hand for Miko to embrace like he did nearly a year ago when Bulkhead returned from the Space Bridge Battle, and Miko was just glad Bulkhead survived and made it back. But this time he doesn't. She has Smokescreen for that now. He limps on into the dark hallway, contemplating which is worse. He hears Miko run after him, and he wonders what she wants when Smokescreen is here to listen to her.

"Please, Bulkhead, talk to me," she pleads, and Bulkhead nearly snorts with the false show of concern she's putting up. _I'm mean, come on, Miko. You were so excited to give Smokescreen a tour of the base. You would have done it if I hadn't intervened. You would have done it, and you two would bond with both of your love of anything that shows off, and you would leave me to atrophy. _Bulkhead continues to limp on and contemplate which is worse. _Both have to do with the spark, but is it the sucking of the spark's light or the enfolding darkness around the spark's light that hurts the worse?* Team replacing you or Miko replacing you?_

Miko is not the type of girl to be deterred. After all, if she was, she wouldn't be in Japser, hanging out with the Autobots so in a more demanding voice she said, "Come on, Bulkhead! Friends talk to each other when there's something wrong so talk to me!"

Finally concluding that being replaced by your best buddy is worse than being replaced by your team and getting sick of the false display of concern, Bulkhead whipped around, and in a low accusing voice, he said, "Go back to Smokescreen, your _new _buddy. I bet he'll make a better friend than I am." He turned around and limped to his berth. _Why did my room have to be the one at the end of this Pit-forsaken hallway? If it was closer to the entrance, I wouldn't have to deal with this right now!_

Miko was stunned like she was slapped in the face. Bulkhead _never _talks to her like that. He always spoke to her in a kind, gentle voice or in an excited, pumped-up-ready-to-go voice or anything other than angry and accusing. Miko quickly shook off the feeling. If Bulkhead wasn't going to talk, she _will. _Miko ran to catch up to Bulkhead and followed him. "What the hell is that suppose to mean?" she demanded.

Once again Bulkhead stopped limping. He was going to have this argument sooner or later. Might as well be now. He just hoped that the others didn't hear. _Not that it mattered. _He turned around. Miko stepped back a little. Never before Bulkhead looked down on her with anger. Not even when she failed tests or landed in detention. With those things, Bulkhead was only disappointed in her, and with her incessant begging of dunce bashing and monster truck rally marathons, the disappointment never lasted long. Miko wondered if this is what a Decepticon felt like when about to face off with Bulkhead.

"I've seen the way you act like when you're around Smokescreen – nothing but excitement and admiration just like you acted like the first day you met me! He's the new best thing in your mind, isn't he? I'm worn out and fighting off atrophy, and Smokescreen is bursting with energy and fire blasts. You'll replace me just like the others!" Bulkhead yelled.

Anger began to swell up in Miko. How dare Bulkhead accuse her of something as lowly as replacing friends. _So still, almost dead, may never fully function. _"That's not true!" Miko yelled as she flashbacked to the days when Bulkhead was induced stasis and suffering Tox-En poisoning. _May never fully function, may never be my Bulkhead, my best friend, my big, green, well-oiled machine guardian angel._

"Oh really? How?! You'll just kick me out of your heart and forget about me! And when Smokescreen's run his course and somebody new comes along, you'll replace him, too!"

Tears started to pour as Bulkhead broke Miko's heart with his false accusations. _He's just frustrated. He doesn't really mean it. _Convincing herself didn't work as Bulkhead's glare pierced her skin. She suddenly felt small and weak. Losing all her fire, she managed to peep out, "Because…"

But Bulkhead wouldn't let her finish. "Because, what?!"

But those same false accusations that took away her fire gave her something new – a fiery reason to prove Bulkhead wrong.

"So?!" Bulkhead demanded. _She can't speak. I'm right. _"Guess –"

"Because I swore never to leave you!" Miko blurted out. The newfound fire gone, she collapsed on the ground and began to sob. "That day," she said sadly, "I saw you so still and so deathlike that I really thought I was gonna lose you. If I hadn't gone to New York maybe you wouldn't be dying in front of me. Agent Fowler said it wasn't my fault, and it was Hardshell's, but still…" More sobs escaped. "I couldn't give up on you, but I wanted justice so I teamed up with Wheeljack in a quest for revenge. Wheeljack fought Hardshell, but I'm the one who killed him with the _Jackhammer_'s missiles when he was gonna kill Wheeljack. I-I couldn't lose Wheeljack like I might have lost you. Wheeljack said I made you proud, but I still felt like it was my fault that you were lying on Ratchet's medical bed, dying of Tox_En. When we got back, Ratchet said you would survive, but you may never fully function the same again. I thought I lost you forever and swore to never leave your side again. I'm sorry!" Miko bawled her eyes.

Bulkhead's glare softened, and his anger turned to guilt. _That explains Ratchet's comment about Wheeljack's revenge stunt with Miko._ _How could I have accused her of replacing me? How could I have made her cry like that? She was terrified that she was gonna lose me, avenged me, and is helping me recover. How could I have accused her of being a user? _"Hey, hey," Bulkhead gently said. He picked Miko up and brought her close to his spark so he could assure Miko that his spark was bright and strong and still _here_. "I'm not going anywhere."

Miko continued crying until her skin was wet from tears and hot from the warmth of Bulkhead's spark. She rubbed her eyes dry. "I'm sorry for crying all over your armor."

"No, Miko, I should be the one who's sorry. I'm the one who made you cry. I let my anger get the best of me, and it fragged up my processers, making me accusing you of being the worst friend when in reality, you're the farthest thing from it. I never wanted to make you cry. Can you forgive me?"

"Only if you forgive me for going to New York which could have prevented this whole mess," Miko asked, tired from all the crying.

"Miko, there was nothing you could have done. I would have still gone to the equator to retrieve the relic whether you got o New York or not, and if you didn't, I would have made you stay behind. The fact that you went and faced Hardshell for me freaks me out," Bulkhead reassured.

Miko looked up at Bulkhead's, thankfully not glaring, face. "Why?"

Bulkhead held her tighter. "You could have been killed. You and Wheeljack both but mostly you. I couldn't stand it if I lost you."

Miko snuggled against Bulkhead. "I'm still here."

"You're not like Wheeljack or me, Miko. You don't have armor, weapons, or fighting skills. You could have easily gotten killed."

"I know, but I couldn't let that _insect _hurt you and get away with it. I couldn't stand it if anything happened to you, Bulk."

Bulkhead sighed and rubbed the back of her head. "I know, and I was stupid to think otherwise. Just don't do that again, ok?"

Miko looked up at Bulkhead. "Well, just don't die or stop fully functioning on me, ok?" Miko's cheerfulness was starting to return

Bulkhead smiled. "Deal."

Miko spread out her arms, trying to hug him the best she could. "I love you, Bulk."

Bulkhead brought Miko closer to his face. "I love you, too, Miko."

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***The human equivalent of "Both have to do with the heart, but is it the breaking of the heart or the hardening of the heart that hurts the worse?"**


End file.
